Something broke inside me today, I am taking humiliation on a constant basis, but this one are one of those which changes your views.
Earlier humiliations just made me feel like I am useless and worthless and incompetent in some sense, but today whatever happened made me realize that It's just not a question of worth and competency. it's simple and purest feeling of being cheated on.
In a way its good for me, maybe I will never think of romantically being involved in anyway. Being honest was not just a bad idea, it was outright crime. It's not foolishness It was illegal.
I have taken enough, Why I have always been trying to see the perfect person inside others and what in my own definition realizing is a terrible and horrible person or both.
It's a fight of selfishness, i lost and thought that it was because I was selfish and later realized that my selfishness was puny and innocent with what it was dealing with.
Seriously, every passing day I realize that how weak I am, more than the day before. What's the limit of it? When will it stop.
Isn't it's funny that the worst trait of you is that you are nice.
Some part of me wants to confront her, but what's the point. I must be paying for the wrongs I did, I just don't know what wrong.
I must let the grudge go, But I feel this grudge has made me a different person. Where did all the positivism went.
Only answer I have got for all of it is "so be it".
Earlier humiliations just made me feel like I am useless and worthless and incompetent in some sense, but today whatever happened made me realize that It's just not a question of worth and competency. it's simple and purest feeling of being cheated on.
In a way its good for me, maybe I will never think of romantically being involved in anyway. Being honest was not just a bad idea, it was outright crime. It's not foolishness It was illegal.
I have taken enough, Why I have always been trying to see the perfect person inside others and what in my own definition realizing is a terrible and horrible person or both.
It's a fight of selfishness, i lost and thought that it was because I was selfish and later realized that my selfishness was puny and innocent with what it was dealing with.
Seriously, every passing day I realize that how weak I am, more than the day before. What's the limit of it? When will it stop.
Isn't it's funny that the worst trait of you is that you are nice.
Some part of me wants to confront her, but what's the point. I must be paying for the wrongs I did, I just don't know what wrong.
I must let the grudge go, But I feel this grudge has made me a different person. Where did all the positivism went.
Only answer I have got for all of it is "so be it".
No comments:
Post a Comment
Your views........